2021 has been another challenging year for so many of us. But as it came to a close and I looked back at all that had happened, I realized that one thing really stood out:

Connection.

Through everything that happened, both good and bad, the connections I developed with friends, family, clients, and even with myself have become even stronger.

I find that before I start to set intentions for a new year I have to reflect on what happened in the previous year. Taking time to look back is important. When I asked my community what stood out for them last year I got some amazing responses. The common thread was that when they actually took the time to look back at last year there was more good than they had remembered. While most felt the year ended on a tough note, the look back gave them a reframe and a more positive outlook.

It is often easier to remember all the bad things that happened to us. Our brains can get stuck in a negative feedback loop, or a negativity bias. Our brains are wired to remember negative experiences more than positive ones. This is a result of our evolution; we needed to pay more attention to the bad or negative threats because it was a matter of life or death. Even though we no longer live in a world where we have to be on guard constantly we still carry this trait in our genes. But if we want to cultivate a life that we really love it’s important to take the time to notice all the good things that happened as well.

You can do this by paying attention to how your brain interprets a situation. We are quick to believe when our brains tell us something is negative but ask yourself if this is really true. For example, you may have had a review from your boss and they mentioned one thing that they would like you to work on. The rest of the review was amazing and they could not be happier with your performance. Your brain is going to focus on the one negative thing. When you stop and ask yourself if you really had a horrible review you will see that it is actually not true.

When we start to pay attention to the patterns in our brain we can step back and see things how they really are instead of through the lens of negativity.

Now I’d love to hear from you! When you take the time to look back at 2021 how did it really go. Let me know in the comments.