When Parker was approved to test for her black belt a few months ago, her teachers gave her a question to ponder. They asked her what she had learned from karate over the last seven years. 

When I picked her up that day, she told me what her oral question was going to be and then immediately said she already knew her answer. She said what she had learned was how to celebrate other people’s successes. 

After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I asked her to tell me more. She went on to say that she used to feel jealous when other people got what she wanted, but once she was able to see how much hard work went into something, like getting your black belt, it was actually really easy to be happy for them.

This child never ceases to amaze me but she also got me thinking; why aren’t we all taught to celebrate others instead of using it as a tool to feel jealous or to find things wrong with ourselves?

So many of us wrestle with feelings of not being good enough. We often use other people’s successes to really drive that point home. When we are in a space where we can’t acknowledge and be happy for other people, then we can’t really be happy for ourselves when we achieve something either. 

It goes back to the saying that until you love yourself, you can’t truly love others. The feelings that arise when other people are successful are a great opportunity to really examine the parts of ourselves that don't feel worthy or good enough. 

There is a simple practice that I do when these feelings come up for me. I close my eyes, put my hand on my heart or on my belly and I breath. It’s funny how something so simple can help me to feel more love and kindness for those parts of myself that never feel good enough. 

Practicing self acceptance, self love, and knowing our worth will help us learn to celebrate ourselves so we can, in turn, celebrate other people too.