In July, I spent a week in Rumford, Maine, visiting my Aunt. She bought an 8-bedroom house, part of which she is renovating to use as an Airbnb. It was a fantastic trip with equal parts work and fun.

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One of the best parts of the trip was hearing all my Aunt’s stories. She has lived several lives in her 83 years.

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A frequent theme in her life has been doing the opposite of what others thought she should do. She has had a clear vision for her life and has not been deterred by other people’s thoughts on how she should live.

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If you've ever been in this position, you know how hard it can be to go against the grain and do what you know to be right for you. People, especially the ones who love you and want you to feel safe, often have the biggest objections. This can pull at your heartstrings and make you doubt your decision.

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Her experiences have ranged from getting married young, to a divorce, while still young and with two small children, to going back to school for nursing when everyone else said she should become a receptionist, traveling to underdeveloped countries and creating programs (which people told her she couldn’t do) to create census reports, to marrying the love of her life who was significantly older, to buying a house in rural Maine at the ripe old age of 80.

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As I listened to my Aunt tell all her stories, I felt a kindred connection with her. I realized that I have gone against the grain often and have faced a lot of opinions about how I should live my life as well.

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From being a waitress and bartender after graduating college, buying my first home in an up-and-coming neighborhood, to opening a restaurant, and then a second, closing the second and opening a third, to walking away from my restaurants to work at a yoga studio, traveling to India by myself, and choosing to spend time with family over climbing the corporate ladder. I have had lots of opinions and objections to my decisions.

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I began to wonder why we both followed our hearts instead of everyone else's opinions. Maybe it’s the Cushing blood we share and the stubbornness that comes along with it 😂, or maybe it’s knowing your purpose in life and realizing there really is no choice.

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After spending a day or two with my Aunt, I began to worry about her and all the projects that needed to be done at the house. When she originally bought the house, she was taking this all on with her family. But things changed and she found herself doing the entire project by herself. I felt like this was a huge undertaking for her at this point in her life. I felt scared and uncomfortable knowing the magnitude of what she had taken on. I felt myself wanting to protect her.

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I decided to voice my concerns to her. Her response reminded me who she is and what she’s capable of. She said, “Kathy, this house has given me back my purpose.”

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How can you argue with that?

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Having a purpose is what brings fulfillment in life.

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I recognize this in my own life, this knowing that comes from a place other than your brain that guides you to what is right for me.

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There have been so many times that I have made what felt like a rash decision only to realize later that there was no decision to be made, there was just this underlying knowing of what was to come next, my intuition. When I listen to that rather than all the chatter in my brain things seem simple and easy. I don’t have to go back and forth with things because the decision is so clear.

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My rational mind would try to talk me out of it, to stay where it’s safe and comfortable, deep down knowing that I couldn’t do that because I would never be happy there.

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​Growth only comes when we put ourselves in those uncomfortable places and challenge ourselves.

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We have been taught not to listen to our gut, our intuition. Instead, we are taught to fit in, conform, and play it safe.

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The only things I’ve ever looked back on with regret were the opportunities I passed up because I was scared and wanted to play small, safe, and stay comfortable.

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I know my Aunt lives that way too. When I look at her, I see a woman who has lived an extraordinary life and has done what she was put here to do. How incredible it must be to look back and know you’ve lived your purpose.

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We only get this one life to go and do something with. I know for certain that I will continue to listen to my gut and move forward with purpose and intention.

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Trust yourself because each step forward will build confidence to help you follow your dreams even when everyone else tells you to stay small. They don’t necessarily mean to hold you back; they just stay where life is safe and comfortable. And that’s ok, for them. But you already know you want more.

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My reminder to you: go after what you want. Be afraid but still move forward. Trust your gut, that inner knowing, and move forward with purpose and intention. At the end of the day, that is the only way to live a life of fulfillment.