Stop Hustling

I am reading The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown. In it she says, “When we struggle to believe in our worthiness, we hustle for it.”

Boy, did that hit home. As I read those words I could picture myself, even a few years ago, working so hard to please everybody so that I could feel good about myself. When I think about that person my heart breaks a little. 

It makes me sad to recall that I didn’t believe in myself or think that anything that I did was ever good enough. I constantly put my needs and wants aside to keep everyone around me happy; while making myself miserable. 

I was hustling so I could feel worthy. It left me feeling exhausted mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. 

I don’t know if I could pinpoint the moment that my attitude changed. Those closest to me had been pointing out for years that I wasn’t taking care of myself, and while I heard it, I didn’t believe I was worth it. 

It didn’t all change in one day, but it started with little things. I heard myself say no to someone’s request for my time and energy, when I normally would have said yes. I slowly stopped worrying so much about what other people thought of me. I started to make time in my days for a bath and to read a book. Rest became a priority. I stopped trying to do it all; I started asking other people for help.  

They were all small things that had a huge cumulative effect. As I started to take care of myself, I stopped hustling. I could see my people pleasing tendencies and pause when they began to present themselves. I started to love myself and practice compassion and kindness towards myself. I allowed myself to be a vulnerable, messy human being. 

When we become authentically ourselves then we can live more joyful lives. You are worthy just because you are you!